It's been proven that laughing is healthy for you so, why not try to stop what you are doing, spend a couple of minutes to read some jokes or funny quotes or even funny clips! What I can share right now is in Tagalog...
Street Vendor : "bili na kayo ng relos! gold watch ito!
pag namuti, white gold!
pag huminto stopwatch!"
gf : hu hu hu hu bakit natin ginawa ito? hindi na ako virgin at dalawang beses pa natin ginawa!
bf : ano? isa lang ah?!
gf : bakit, hindi na ba natin uulitin mamaya?!
Couple talking:
wife hon, paki fix naman ilaw sa labas.
husband => hello!? electrician ba ako?
wife => eh di paki gawa na lang ang hagdan natin.
husband => hello!? karpintero ba ako?
umalis si husband, pagbalik gawa ng lahat ang sira sa
bahay. tinanong niya ang wife kung sino ang gumawa ng trabaho.
wife => kasi kanina a man saw me crying, sabi ko ang daming sira dito sa bahay. so he offered to help in exhange of either sex or bake him a cake.
husband => so pinag-bake mo siya ng cake?
wife => hello?! baker ba ako?!
ANG MARRIED LIFE....
May isang intsik na sa sobrang hilig sa karaoke ay
inabot ng 5 am.
Dahil sa takot mabugbog ni misis, nag-text ng:
"HUWAG KA BAYAD RANSOM. NAKATAKAS AKO. UWI NA KOH!"
Husband: "Parati na lang tayong nag-aaway! Maghiwalay na nga tayo!"
Wife: "Sige, maghati tayo ng mga anak!"
Husband: "Akin ang mga guwapo at maganda!"
Wife: "Sus! Pinili pa yung hindi kanya!"
Sa harap ng nursery window-
Friend: Pare, pag laki ng anak mo, I am sure magaling mag-drive
Dad: Bakit, pare, malaki ba ang kamay?
Friend: Hindi. Kasi kamukha siya ng driver ninyo!
Husband came home from church, suddenly lifted his wife
and carried her.
Wife: Why!? Did the Pastor tell you to be romantic like this?
Husband: No!! He told me to carry my cross!
Friend: "Wow, pare, ganda ng sapatos mo, ah!"
Husband: "Oo. Surprise gift ng kumare mo!"
Friend: "Surprise? Anong okasyon?"
Husband: "Wala. Nakita ko na lang ito sa ilalim ng kama namin kagabi!"
Health Advisory: "Beer contains female hormones, and can turn men into women.
After 5 pints-men become talkative, unreasonable,
irritable, cry for nothing, and urinate while sitting!"
WIFE: I'm warning you! Parating na ang husband ko in one (1) hour!
HANDSOME VISITOR: Wala naman akong ginawang masama ah?
WIFE: kaya nga! kung may balak ka, GAWIN MO NA!!!
WIFE: Himala! aga mong umuwi ngayon.
HUSBAND: Sinunod ko lang ang utos ng boss ko. Sabi nya "GO TO HELL", kaya eto - uwi agad ako..
Wife: Lab, may taning na ang buhay ko. Huling gabi ko na
to, let's make love.
Husband: Heh! tumigil ka nga. Maaga pa akong gigising
bukas, buti ikaw, hindi na.
HE HE HE HE !!!!
Population policies of countries:
China : Stop at one (1) child.
Singapore : Stop at two (2) children
Phil: STOP AT FOUR (4) A.M.!
RUSSIAN: we're 1st in space
USA : we're 1st in the moon
ERAP: we'll be the 1st in the sun
USA: you can't go there, you'll burn
ERAP: we're not stupid, we'll go there at NIGHT!
Ano kadalasan ang sinasabi kapag nautot?
American: Excuse me.
British: Pardon me.
Pinoy: NOT ME!
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